The First Meeting: 5 Helpful Tips for Surrogates & Intended Parents

Whether you are a Gestational Surrogate or Intended Parents bringing a child into the world through surrogacy, there is bound to be a series of emotions surrounding the first meeting. The anxiety and excitement you feel may seem like what you experienced on your first date. At Physician’s Surrogacy, the nation’s only OB-Managed Surrogacy, we believe each and every surrogacy journey is unique and special in its own way. We know there is a lot of things to consider when selecting a Surrogate Mother and the right surrogacy agency. It is our constant effort to simplify your surrogacy journey to give you peace of mind.

Meeting the Surrogate mother for first time with a Surrogacy Agency

Although the conversation may be a little bit awkward in the beginning, don’t worry. The aim of this meeting is to make sure you have both found the perfect Surrogate match before commencing the surrogacy journey. This face-to-face interaction will be the start of a special relationship with one another over the next couple of months.

Whether the meeting is in person or through a video call, take a slow breath, and relax. Below are some tips to calm your mind and make the meeting go smoothly.

1. Be ready

A little preparation before the day of the meeting can go a long way. If you are working with one of the best surrogacy agencies in California, you will be able to check the profile of your Intended Parents or Gestational Surrogate. This will enable you to form an idea of who they are and what they aim to achieve with this process.

Write down some questions and things you would like to talk about during the first meeting. If the meeting is through a video conference, make sure to check the program you will be using and ensure that you have a reliable internet connection. Doing this will help prevent any technical issues or dropped calls.

2. Trust the process & your Surrogacy Agency

Intended Parents may feel like they need to attend the first in-person meeting with a long list of requirements for the Gestational Surrogate. This is completely understandable. However, discussing finances or medical advice straight away can put a damper on your future relationship with the Surrogate.

Some of the best surrogacy agencies, like Physician’s Surrogacy in California, consider your preferences for a Gestational Surrogate before scheduling the first meeting. The chosen surrogate mom will share most of your goals and expectations for the gestational surrogacy process. She will also receive the advice of medical doctors to keep the baby safe and healthy.

3. Keep the conversation Light

A little communication etiquette can help create trust between the Surrogate and the Intended Parents. Be thoughtful in the way you ask questions and what you choose to discuss. While it is okay to be curious about each other, endeavor to keep the conversation light. Bear in mind that the first interaction isn’t all about screening one another. Both Intended Parents and Surrogates are screened before they are allowed to join the surrogacy program:

As the best surrogacy agency in California, we recommend to base the conversation on getting to know each other with topics such as:

4. Listen

If you are too anxious and nervous, you can start rambling or take over the discussion without even knowing it. Note that the main reason for the meeting is to be acquainted with each other. Prepare some questions that can make the other person open up and narrate their stories if the discussion is becoming too formal.

5. Share your expectations & hopes

Communication is an important part of any surrogacy journey, whether you are using a known surrogate mother or an agency. An honest and open relationship between the Intended Parents and Surrogates can improve the chances of success. That’s the reason why this is the ideal time to let the other person know your communication expectations. For example, ask how often are you going to talk? Will you meet in person or talk over the phone?

Both the Surrogate and the Intended Parents have to be on the same page. Each of the parties involved may need to compromise – and that’s totally fine as long as the conversation ends with an idea of what is to come.

Begin your Surrogacy Journey today with Physician’s Surrogacy Agency

If you want to become Parents using surrogacy and planning to bring a baby in the world with the help of the best surrogacy agency, Physician’s Surrogacy is ready to help. Please contact our agency at 858-951-1868 today to schedule a free consultation or visit us at

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Physician’s Surrogacy is the nation’s only physician-managed surrogacy agency. Join our community to get updates on surrogacy, expert insights, free resources and more.

Looking for Reliable Surrogacy Info?

Physician’s Surrogacy is the nation’s only physician-managed surrogacy agency. Join our community to get updates on surrogacy, expert insights, free resources and more.